How Many Kids Do You Have? - History Gal

How Many Kids Do You Have?

This is such an innocent question, but it always make me pause. You see, I have 3 children. Two, a beautiful daughter and son, are here with me and my husband. But, my middle child, is in heaven. While he is physically not here with us, he lives in our hearts.  
The Musings of a History Gal:
When someone asks, "How many kids do you have?" The inevitable follow-up question is "How old are they?" If I've said 3 kids, now I have to explain that one is 9, one is 5, and one would have been 7. Then, people want to know what happened or they express their sympathy. Either way, it's an awkward conversation to have in the middle of the grocery store check-out lane. So I find myself weighing whether or not I should respond with "2 kids" or "3 kids." I'm sure people have wondered about my silent pause when they've asked the question and thought "who doesn't know how many kids they have?!" After a brief pause, I usually respond, "2 kids - a wonderful boy and girl."

The Musings of a History Gal:'s been almost seven years since God called our little boy home. Even though he lives in heaven and not with us, he is still my son. I miss him and I love him. And, I hold tight to God's promise that I will see him again. 
Sometimes, God uses the question "how many kids do you have?" to give me opportunity to share my story with another woman struggling with the loss of a child. I certainly don't have all the answers, but I know through my experience that God answers prayers and that God has a plan for all things - even those times when bad things happen.

I'm not saying we need to stop asking people how many kids they have - just be aware that it isn't always an easy question to answer. If you've lost a child, I want you to know that you are not alone in pausing and wondering what to say when someone asks you, "how many kids do you have?."


  1. Thank you for sharing, Andrea. I am sorry you experienced that. It's admirable that you find comfort in using your experience to comfort others.


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